Tag Archives: #kidlulz

A load of 2011 updates

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It’s almost been an eternity since we had regular internet access at home, so there’s been no blogs for some time.

I’ve occasionally added to a journal, so I’ll post some of these out of date and out of context items below – and reset the date of the publishing, as they were mostly from the start of the year.

The cause of the internet issues was us moving from our spacious Tecom apartment, to an even more spacious villa. So although it was quite painful going without internet, the move was worthwhile.

At the end of 2010 we moved to our Safa villa, which is a family-friendly compound for Emirates employees.  We knew it would be good for children, as we had friends living here before us (incidentally who have left the organisation and country).  Within an hour of us moving, Myles had a friend over, that afternoon they doubled, and now he pretty much lives outside – or brings them here.  The new place almost feels like a holiday house for him with all the new kids to meet and play with.  It didn’t take long though for him to make a regular group of friends. Now it’s not too uncommon to have half a dozen kids around our dinner table doing a painting or some activity we were used to doing with Myles & Lewis alone.  Or through Tecom families we’d need to organise in advance or call around. Now it’s just the kids’ way of life.

With the move to a new area, Myles and I had another failed trip to the library. I assumed they’d be open after 10am on a Saturday. No, it’s not open on the weekend at all. Just like the last time we tried and #failed, it ended with us visiting a nearby Islamic book store and buying a book.  This time we bought animals mentioned in the Holy Qur’an – each chapter told a story of a different animal and history, including one story towards the end comparing Jews to monkeys.

On the work front, our annual IT department meeting reaffirmed our vision that have come from our exec team. And they also discussed our high level goals. To help everyone become a part of this, everyone was given a small piece of paper and told to draw their vision for the organisation’s IT. People were eager to participate, given the incentive of a surprise gift going to the winning entry.  As I told Myles about this, he got a puzzled looking face and wondered why I’m doing kid activities like drawing pictures, and trying to learn Arabic.  He suggested I must work in a nursery.  A few grown-ups could think the same.

We also had another go at dune bashing. One of the guys seems to have more experience (and stories primarily) than the rest of us, but he doesn’t seem to have the same amount of luck with staying out of trouble. He’s the only guy in the group who doesn’t work at Emirates. Myles learnt this, and thought since he drives so crazy, instead of working with us at Emirates he must be a taxi driver. Not only did he have car operating troubles, when we all paused to cool down my poor engine, a group of local guys took some interest in his car and stole it.  Well not literally stealing, but taking it for one hell of a spin. They clearly have no fear, and know how to have a good time.

Also at work we had our 7s Cricket tournament.  It used to be a regular fixture for the people at Emirates. Being an Aussie, I thought I’d have to give it a try. Not that it matters, my estimates of the racial breakdown of the 60-70 players were: 90% Indian, 5% Pakistani, 4% Sri Lankan, and me. And in terms of performance I felt VERY alone. Every body else out there in the hot sun were living and breathing cricket. I on the other hand, were out with the first ball I faced. Not a good representing of Cricket Australia at all. I pegged things back in the second innings, but it was clear I was, and my team was, there to make up numbers for others who were clearly having the time of their life.

On the running front I’ve done very little, although moving to a stone’s throw from a popular running track around Safa Park. I decided to enter the Dubai Creek Striders Half marathon. My intention was to treat it as a training run, and to indicate whether I was on track for the full marathon or not.  It was a successful test, I was DEFINITELY NOT in shape to think about a full marathon.  At one stage in the race I was struggling behind a couple of women running. Then an old Afghani looking gentleman saw me, and heckled what was I doing, this is Dubai – women are meant to be following the men. I struggled to muster any expression in response – which was probably best.

Wrestling diss

This morning my boys and I had a wrestle, like we often do.

The two of them are really starting to work well together. I can see I’m clearly in danger in the years to come.

Myles especially is starting to take our little contests to the next level. He’s almost starting to sound like a WWE professional. While struggling on top of me, he exclaimed “We’re not trying to kill you, we’re just going to break your head off!”

Not very comforting.

Audi

Myles and I saw our friend Alan in the lift of our apartment building. Myles has an interest in cars, so when Alan left I mentioned that he has a nice Audi. My little guy looked up at me a little strangely, and asked what did it look like so I responded it’s a nice sporty Audi TT. Aah, to this he was a bit relieved. Myles thought I had said Alan had an “outtie” – Australian slang for an unusual belly button that protrudes out instead of going in.
NB: I cannot confirm whether Alan’s belly button goes in or out.

Scary Stickers

Myles and I were looking at a book of his stickers this morning. It’s a collection of poorly copied Thomas the Tank Engine pictures, and a few buzz words. I got Myles to tell me what one of the words said, he was able to sound it out – “SPEED”. He pointed at one to show me, but without looking at it I asked, ‘what does it say?’ Myles looked at me and said it’s a picture of a pencil – in a tone which sounded a bit like “what are you going on about Dad?”. But then with a cheeky grin he put the sticker book to his ear, and eerily said to me – “It’s saying it’s going to kill you!”

Toilet training hiccup

We’ve started toilet training Lewis, from around 1 year and 3-4 months of age. He has been a real natural. From the first time I put him on the seat, he’s been pretty much able to Number 1 on demand.

This afternoon he went without a nappy for a while. It’s interesting how he seems to dance a lot more when he’s nude.

I was a little paranoid he was going to wee on the floor, so I asked him if he wanted to wee on the toilet. He nodded with conviction. So we went to the toilet, where he managed a little trickle, which I applauded in the interests of encouragement.  Incidentally, he occasionally sneaks into the toilet when Elle or I are in there doing our own business, and it’s interesting to see when we’re done he now claps us too.

A little while later he was running around the couch I was sitting on, and when he was standing behind me I asked if he wanted to wee on the toilet again. I turned around and saw him nod again, and was excited that he’s starting to communicate it so well. But then I spotted him looking down. Oh no! I looked to where he was looking, and yep – he wanted to wee alright. He wanted to wee all over the floor. There floor was covered in litres of yellow. It caused me to think the first one on the toilet was him actually holding it in, so he could get maximum effect later.

Oh well, we’ll keep trying. It’s all progress I guess.

False Advertising

Last night I took Myles to the medical clinic. Without getting into any gory details, the outcome was we got some cream for him to apply.

When we got home he asked to see the cream, which had a lion as the logo. His face screwed up in a look of disappointment when he saw the packet, and he asked the imperative question “Why do we have to put it on a lion?!”

“Children’s” Hospital

When we were in Melbourne in October, we took Myles on his first tram ride. We just jumped on the first one we saw, as we didn’t really understand the system from our apartment.

The line we were on went past the Royal Children’s Hospital. The hospital had some large posters featuring kids which was hiding some construction work. The pictures of kids got Myles’s attention, so he asked what it was. I told him it was the Children’s Hospital. He looked a bit puzzled by this, then made the point, “kids can’t be doctors!”.

Winners are grinners

We were back in Australia for the race that stops the nation, The Melbourne Cup. As part of a pretty common tradition we ran a sweep amongst those who happened to be around. And for the first time we included the kids, Myles aged 5 and Ethan aged 4. It was all fun and games as they learned which horses they had, and boasted about the chances of their particular horses winning and making them rich – rich from the booty of $22.

Myles happened to get the horse Crime Scene, which was trained in our adopted country of Dubai by His Heighness Sheikh Mohammed’s stable, Godolphin. Myles was over the moon with the coincidental connection to HH.

The horse got a great 2nd place, but that was highly disappointing for Myles. Tears flowed as he got more upset than I had seen him in years. We tried to make the most of the situation and teach him some valuable lessons that not everyone can win, and so on. But it all went badly. We even tried playing down the event to make him know that the race didn’t really matter in the end, but that didn’t diffuse the situation at all. In the end I also tried to use Myles’s sense of pride toward Sheikh Mohammed to ease his grief. But that one blew right up in my face! I simply told Myles, come on now don’t cry. Then I rhetorically asked if he thought Sheikh Mohammed is at home crying on his bed because his horse didn’t win. Myles looked at me quite indignantly with his now blood-shot eyes, and replied shirtly to me, “Yes Dad, I’m sure he is!”.

Titanic

Since seeing the movie, my son has become a big fan of the Titanic. So last night when we heard the theme song, “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion we asked if he recognised where the song was from. Maybe it was the noise of the restaurant, but he didn’t recognise it so Elle said it was from the Titanic. He listened again intently, then a sudden look of realisation took over his face as he told us, “Yeah, it’s when they were dying”.